I’m so excited to share this with you from my friend and fellow Proverbs 31 writer, Lynn Cowell. If you’ve ever struggled with being confident in the woman God made you to be; or if you’re raising a young woman who you desperately hope will know how beautiful she is, then I know you’ll be blessed by Lynn’s words …
What should I wear for the first day back to school, diary?
Jordache jeans, schrunchies and white L.A. Gear?
Lacoste, cardigans and penny loafers?
Black eyeliner, mega earrings and a mini-skirt?
Reading my diaries recently, I was pulled right back to that day of staring at a closet full of clothes that were as conflicted as I was.
Just read some of my swirling thoughts in sixth grade (note the dates after each entry):
“. . . Right now I don’t think much about boys. I may act like it, but I don’t.”—March 23
“Sam called and asked me to ‘go’ with him. I didn’t want to, but my best friend told him I said ‘yes’.”—March 26
“Today, nothing much happened. I don’t know how my friend got me in this mess with Sam and I don’t know what to do. Lord, get me out!”—March 27
“I broke up with Sam. Boy, am I glad I did. But he asked me to go out with him again. Ugh!”—March 28
What a struggle! There were many other times I wrote about frustrated feelings with friends and family and confusion on what do to.
Do you know what the problem was with many of my problems?
I was fearful of people.
I wasn’t sure of the girl I was or the girl I wanted to be. Standing on the shaky foundation of the fickle and flippant opinions of others, I bobbed and weaved to fit each situation I found myself in. So often I found myself acting all sorts of ways, so I could be the person I thought my friends and family wanted.
Like the situation with Sam.
God has since shown me in His Word that I don’t have to spin like the Tilt-O-Whirl at the amusement park; trying to be everything to everybody. Even now,
I’m continually working with Him to mature and become the one He created me to be … not a copy of someone else.
More days than not, I’m skipping the line on the comparison ride, becoming more and more brave every day.
Ephesians 4:14 tells us:
Then we will no longer be immature like children. We won’t be tossed and blown about by every wind of new teaching. We will not be influenced when people try to trick us with lies so clever they sound like the truth.” (NLT)
Paul is telling us we don’t have to believe all the things people say about God; that can make us shaky. We need to believe what God says about Himself.
The same is true when we spin this way that, believing things that are not true about ourselves and then trying to be someone we are not. It makes us shaky inside—insecure.
Statistics tell us that a girl’s confidence peaks at age 9.
Age 9 … before this crazy, comparison ride calls for them to get on.
As children grow from child to adult, God can help them so they can build a solid foundation on Him, instead of on the ever changing opinions of others. They don’t have to feel like they’re constantly pushed one way and then the other. He can make them brave and give them the courage to be their true selves and build a confidence in Christ that stands firm for the days to come.
Brave Beauty: Finding the Fearless You
“Brave Beauty: Finding the Fearless You”, Lynn Cowell’s newest book, is written especially for girls between the ages 8 – 12. It’s not just a book — it’s a companion guide on a girl’s journey to learning to become courageous, confident and fearless.
Brave Beauty helps tween girls to:
- Gain confidence by accepting her unique qualities and understand how they can work for her, not against her.
- Discover who God says she is, in His eyes, and how He can help her.
- Discuss the tough stuff she’s going through as she changes physically, emotionally, relationally and spiritually.
- Learn how God’s words can help her become brave and beautiful.
Today, Lynn is sharing a free I Am Brave printable for you to frame for your child to remind them to be brave! You’ll also be able to claim additional free resources, including Grounded: Standing Firm in a Roller Coaster World mini-workbook, to help her gain Christ Confidence. Just click here!
Lynn Cowell is a Proverbs 31 speaker and the author of several books, written for young girls, teen girls and women of all ages. Her newest book Brave Beauty: Finding the Fearless You is written for girls ages 8 -12. Make Your Move: Finding Unshakeable Confidence Despite Your Fears and Failures a Bible study for women releases this fall. Her husband and their three children and the occasional backyard deer, live in North Carolina where they love hiking, rafting and anything combining chocolate and peanut butter.