I don’t wake up most days thinking I’ll try to have an awful day today.
But, I also don’t wake up most days thinking, This will be my best day yet.
Instead I fall somewhere in between. Alarm rings. Feet to the floor. Enter routine.
But with each activity something silent seeps in, and it’s this something silent that eventually spoils or satisfies my daily longings.
I scurried about packing myself, my kids and my husband. The week-long adventure ahead would be fun – if only we could get there. And, of course, someone had to turn up sick the day before we left.
I tried to contain my patient and keep his siblings from meddling too much in his germs. All the while the washing machine whirled and clothes piled up around me in semi-organized stacks.
Why am I the only one in this house preparing to leave? Shouldn’t someone else be a part of this process? I mean, last I checked I’m not the only one taking this trip. So why is it my sole responsibility to take care of every tiny detail?
With a smile on my face and a soft tone in my talk I continued corralling and shuffling kids and clothes. No one could have known of my thoughts’ assault … right up until Dad walked through the door.
Completely unsuspecting he bounded through the door as the sick kid asked for a cracker, “Sure buddy!” he obliged with a kind heart and reached for the cracker box.
It’s at this moment the inner assault announced itself.
“NO!” I pretty much shouted. “I’M IN CHARGE!” Add a fierce finger wag and you get the picture.
Stunned, everyone in ear shot froze. What happened to Mom? They all must have wondered. One minute she’s pleasant and patient. The next minute, explosion.
I’ve struggled with this more than I’d like to admit. And I’ve gone to God so many times saying, I don’t want to be this way. How can I stop erupting so unexpectedly?
For years I fell victim to this cycle and had no idea how to get off, until recently when God exposed those spoiler thoughts.
So letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death. But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace.” Romans 8:6 (NLT)
As I move about my day, I weave into it’s fibers life or death.
The silent whispers within determine whether my soul will be spoiled or satisfied this day. Every day.
It’s so easy to throw a really impressive pity party. When the service is high and the support is low. Or when we seek to do right and the ones around us just don’t care. We can make lists of all we deserve, all we’ve earned, all the ways others let us down. Or we can let the Spirit plan the party.
This party decorates our days much differently.
The Spirit blows up thanksgiving and it lifts our thoughts. The Spirit drapes compassion across our hearts and it welcomes those passing by. The Spirit spreads out understanding and offers all who join the party a feast of God’s truth and love.
Thankfully, that day my thoughts made a big mess all over my family, God’s grace helped us clean it up. My husband must have let the Spirit take charge, because he laughed it off and offered a helping hand. The sick kid got better and no one else came down with the bug. We all made it out the door, mostly smiling.
Satisfied or spoiled. I can control that today, as long as I let the Spirit control my mind.
Have you ever struggled with erupting unexpectedly? What are some ways we can let the Spirit control our minds instead of our sinful nature? Share your ideas in the comments section below!