3 Parenting Ideas
With six kids under my roof and under my care, I’ve learned a lot. I’m still learning. And I desperately want to do this right.
So, as I journey through my fights and failures, I thought I’d share some things I think about. Pray about. Hope for. This is post 1 of 3. A series designed, not to make our kids perfect, but to turn our own hearts towards God. And hope His love seeps out of our souls and into the little one’s who watch us.
My decade immersed in athletics aids me in parenting. I watch up close as NFL teams seek to put their best product on the field. Up against heavy demands and endless adjustments, they work with determination to take on these obstacles and succeed.
It reminds me a little of motherhood.
Just when you think you’ve found the formula someone rips the rug out from under you. What worked yesterday produces a completely different – less desirable – result today. Self-doubt floods your heart and confusion clinches your teeth. What am I suppose to do? Surely, Michelle Duggar’s kids never act like this.
After searching Scripture for a chapter with a detailed list of, “If your child does this … then you should do this …,” I shut the book disappointed and asked God why He left that out.
The next few years took me on an adventure where I realized God meant for the entire Bible to answer my questions! Not just one book or chapter, but the whole thing, reveals the love and guidance of a Father to His children.
And what better example to draw from.
So, we’ll start with three things I observe from God our Father and how we can apply them to our parenting:
1. Routine
From the first book of the Bible, God uses routine. Creation follows a pattern of seasons. The earth rotates and revolves on a schedule. God weaves order amidst the beauty of His tapestry.
As the stars and seedlings need routine, so do we. And I’ve noticed my children thrive more with a schedule than without one. When the routine I create for my kids is detailed and intentional, three things happen. The routine:
- Relieves Resistance – hearts obey with less friction
- Eliminates Extra – whining and complaining cease (okay not completely)
- Facilitates Freedom – we all gain more independence amidst daily direction
For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:” Ecclesiastes 3:1 (ESV)
2. Repetition
Sometimes we feel like repeating ourselves means the kids have a problem. But God repeats Himself throughout the pages of Scripture. In Deuteronomy and Joshua He reminds His children over and over again of what He expects of them.
God, in His patience and deep desire for great things for Israel, keeps telling them what to do. He drives it deep into their hearts. Remember, remember, remember. We have permission to repeat our commands to our children!
This isn’t the same as delayed obedience. Instead, it’s the idea of giving our children every opportunity to trust and obey, both God and us. When we repeat our expectations and instructions we:
- Lay a solid foundation to build on in the future
- Strengthen and sustain God’s teaching
- Aid in the advancement of God’s Truth
Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up.” Deuteronomy 6:7 (NLT)
3. Rest
Rest cultivates connection. Some of my favorite times with my kids come when I snuggle up next to them at the end of the day. Their bodies and minds quiet down, and we have those few minutes where demands drift away. Other things no longer tug at our hearts or attention. We sit together and bring whole hearts to share. Rest is such a sweet thing.
By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work.” Genesis 2:2 (NIV)
As we head into our week and seek to point our babies to Jesus. I want to leave you with these two ideas. Sow in peace. Trust love.
James 3:18 tells us, “a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace.” As parents, if we desire to cultivate a love for Jesus and His Word our labor must be done peacefully. Absent of anger.
And finally, love. In Lysa TerKeurst’s book, The Best Yes she writes, “The ways of God insist on an attitude of love. Therefore, my ways should reflect an attitude of love.”
When I look back at these years when my little ones run around my knees and I share all these hours with their soft hearts in my palms, oh how I pray I see love. Instruction laced up in love. Direction prompted by love. Training with love as the goal. Love that never fails.
Dear Jesus, I often wonder why you chose me to nurture such precious treasures. I know I will fail daily. But You promise love covers a multitude of sins. May Your grace that is sufficient for me spill over. And may Your love abound more and more, blanketing my children – Your children. Amen!
Post #2 in this series: How to Prepare as a Parent
Post #3 in this series: Let Them Shine
I have been struggling with this so much with my daughter. She is six years old and exactly like me. I love her so much but let anger overcome me when it comes to her. All I see is her mess-ups and it kills me when I reflect on our day and look at myself and how I reacted to the smallest of issues. My poor sweet baby just keeps loving me and doing her best. She is an awesome kid. I am so afraid that one day I am going to push too hard and she won’t come back to me. I have been praying that God will shut my mouth so that I can reflect before I react. Thank you for this series.
Every Mom loves a parenting series! I would love to see how you do it with 6 little blessings! I know you are awesome at it… A mom’s struggle is a daily battle on trying to give each kiddo their special time, yet still have supper on the table, clean clothes on their backs, etc… so many times I fail but each day starts anew!
I love this–thank you for sharing. I especially needed to hear that last paragraph–everything laced up in love!
Me too. 🙂
Katy I have been hoping you would post a series on parenting ! If any of your precious 6 are strong willed …… I NEED HELP!!!!!!! would love to have a copy of your schedule and the best yes!! Been searching for a good devotional for a mom who has gotten away from her daily quiet time do to exhaustion from working full time and being a mommy- by the time I hit the bed my eyes can hardly stay open . Trying to do Better! Looking forward to the parenting series and if you so feel you want to continue to post after the 3rd one feel free ! I’m sure everyone else would love it too !
Yes girl, I have a few strong willed ones! Take one day at a time and stay patient. Keep committed to sowing God’s Word in their hearts and let His Word do the work! If you can’t find a big chunk of time to get with God keep your Bible close & read one verse at a time throughout your day. I always enjoy that weaving His perspective throughout my day!
This is awesome! I’ve lately taken up with a daily schedule too. I printed it out with boxes (because I am that type needing check lists) and put it in a picture frame. Daily I take a dry erase marker and check off the boxes I hit to try to hold us accountable to a daily schedule. We’re on day 3 but I’ve seen a difference in my productivity at least. I think the notion of rest is really important to the whole scheme of things and being able to pour love into your home. Thanks for this post!
What a great idea, Kathleen! I may copy it. 🙂 Great to keep the schedule out for everybody to see, and I love the simplicity of marking off with a dry erase marker.